THE GUY WHO HUNG THE DOOR WRONG

"Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new." (2 Corinthians 5:17)

"You can lean something from every person!" I can still hear old Pastor Lloyd Westover preaching that with intensity from his pulpit back in 1976. "And that guy digging a ditch, you can learn something from him !" How right Pastor Westover was! (I'm calling him "old Pastor Westover" but at the time he preached that, he was probably only about six or seven years older than I am now!) Some of us would like to think it's the great intellectuals- the highly educated and accomplished people that have lessons to teach us and important things to say to us; sometimes they do. But, many times, it's the most ordinary blue-collar person who makes a statement that impacts you to the core of your being and you never forget it. That's true of Jimmy Peters (not his real name) and the example of the guy who hung the door wrong.

Jimmy Peters was only a superficial friend of mine, at best. Really, he was an acquanitance of mine. Ironically, I knew his parents first, and I knew his parents much better than I knew Jimmy. Jimmy professed to be a born-again Christian, but he was certainly not your "garden variety" evangelical! Jimmy came from a Roman Catholic background. He parents "got saved" when he was around twenty-three years old. Jimmy was big, a muscular guy. He would be described as "macho". He sported several tattoos and he was not a person to walk away from a physical confrontation. He tended to be proud and opinionated. Yet, Jimmy was very intelligent. I'd guess he certainly had a higher I.Q. than I do. He experienced a lot of tragedy and pain in his life. I don't want to write too much about that as it's possible someone reading this who knew him or his family could be deeply grieved by this. I don't know for sure, but my understanding is that Jimmy Peters died several years ago. He was married and he had a son and a daughter who'd each be over thirty today.

As I write today I'm going back in my mind to a Sunday afternoon about twenty-five years ago. Jimmy, his wife and his kids, had come to visit our church's Sunday morning service and we had them back to our home for Sunday dinner. As dinner was being prepared, Jimmy and I were standing and talking near the back door looking out to the yard. Jimmy was doing most of the talking and I was listening. He began to share some observations and disappointments he had about life. It really bothered Jimmy that people, both Christian and non-Christian, almost always focus on the worst points about a person and define a person that way. Jimmy worked in construction, so he used this as an example:

"Let's just say I become a really good builder, and I mean a really good builder! I built all kinds of fantastic buildings. In fact, I'm such a good builder that I put up a building comparable to the Taj Mahal! I won't be remembered as the guy who built the building that's comparable to the Taj Mahal, though." Jimmy lamented. "Now, let's say I'm just having a bad day- for whatever reason. A lady calls me up and asks me to do a simple job; to come and hang a door for her. I'm just having a bad day. I'm not myself. I go there and I hang the door wrong. I will never be known as the guy who built the building comparable to the Taj Mahal. I will be known for the rest of my life as 'the guy who hung the door wrong'!"

I don't remember what my response to him was. In fact, I don't think I had much of any response. I have often thought of that quote. I have often played Jimmy's conversation from that Sunday afternoon over and over in my mind. The sad thing is, he's right. That's how we tend to define people. That's how we tend to remember people. In the way sharks go after blood in the water, we zoom in on people's faults and we magnify them. We define people by their worst flaws. I wish I could tell you that I have never done this, but the fact is, as I think about my adult life, I have often done this. It's so destructive. It's so wrong. And it's so not like Jesus!

I am so ashamed of all the times I've been the one critically characterizing a person as "the one who hung the door wrong!" The factor that's made me really sad and disturbed about this is not that I have done it to others, however. I am very ashamed to say that the factor that's made me really sensitive to this is that it's been done to me. When it's you that's "the guy who hung the door wrong", it's just not very funny.

I read a friend's Facebook post today which exhorted the readers to not sit wallowing in regrets but to "move on". Of course, that post is correct, and it is good advice, but when you're constantly reminded that you're "the one who hung the door wrong" it can be very difficult to "move on". Yes, we sometimes make it very, very difficult for other Christians who are trying to "move on".

In my forty-three years of being a "born-again Christian" I don't think I've ever been more aware of what a flawed person I am (and that I have been) than I am right now. I realize I am nothing without the Lord, Jesus Christ. Nothing. Yes, at one time there was the pride in being "Pastor Bob Baril" and having professional and social recognition. I loved that. I guess I felt like I really deserved it. I know differently, now. I wish I could promise here that I will never make a blanket statement or judgment about another person, essentially labeling him or her as "the one who hung the door wrong". I know I'm flawed. I know in a moment of stupid inattention and pride, I may well do that. I just hope that as soon as God brings to my attention the wrong judgment I have dished out, I will get on my knees and quickly repent! And, I hope and pray I will more and more recognize "Taj Mahal builders" and less and less see and point out those who have "hung the door wrong". Thank you, Jimmy, for your very wise words.