THANKS, KEN, FOR THE MOXIE!

"For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain."  (Philippians 1:21)

Yesterday, I taught an Adult Sunday School class at Bread of Life Church (Westminster, MA).  The material we were studying was Paul's Letter to the Philippians, chapter one, and so we spent some time talking about the above verse.  It also seems most appropriate to use Philippians 1:21 here as I share some thoughts about the late Rev. Dr. Ken Beres who passed away unexpectedly this past Thursday, February 1.

Ken is the third of my pastor friends who has died within the past year.  I wasn't as close to Ken as I was to the other two.  Nevertheless, Ken Beres definitely made an impact on my life!  I've been reflecting about that over the past few days.  Ken pastored First Congregational Church at Lund's Corner in the city of New Bedford, Massachusetts.  Ken was one of several pastors I got to know from attending the Pastors' Prayer Retreats that were held each November at Pilgrim Pines Conference Center in West Swanzey, New Hampshire, under the auspices of Vision New England.  There were something like eighteen of those prayer retreats held there during the 1990s and 2000s.  The first was in 1992 and the last was in 2009; if my count is correct, I attended a total of nine of the prayer retreats.  Depending upon the year, the retreats attracted anywhere between forty and eighty pastors for the three and a half day events.  We'd meet in a beautiful yet casual rustic chapel facility.  We'd arrange our chairs in a big circle in the meeting room- well there were so many pastors that it was usually two circles, a front row and a back row.  We'd spend at least an hour a day signing worship choruses.  Probably two hours or more would be spent in group prayer from the entire gathering.  Sometimes we'd break into groups of about 3-6 for more specific prayer.  At times, we were allowed private time to walk around Swanzey Lake and pray, or to read and pray in our rooms.  These were not days of fasting!  Some very strong friendships were built around the tables of the dining room during the wonderful mealtimes we had, and each evening there was a Communion service in the chapel.

There were a few pastors I really "clicked with" at those retreats.  Honestly, all my life I've been kind of "different".  I have often not felt comfortable with my peers and not always been well accepted by them.  My personality, my style, and my interests, are...well, "different".  One time I told my friend Pastor Dick Germaine that I was "weird".  He got pretty upset with me for using that term, and bluntly told me I should never call myself "weird" again- and I don't think I have done so!  I also used to describe myself on this blog as "eccentric".  I had some family and friends who took great exception to that term, so I toned it down to "unconventional".  But all you have to do is an on-line search for Bob Baril and you'll find a number of very serious Bible-based writings and video teachings, along with some very secular, silly and (dare I say it) "crazy" and comical video pieces and similar things I've posted in writing.  I've noticed that most ministers never post anything on-line and never put any videos of themselves on-line except for material that's very serious, and very pastoral.  I admit that at times I've thought that long after I'm dead someone may check out my "stuff" on-line and have no idea what to make of me!  Well, I didn't mean for that to be such a long interjection, but I said all that because I think one of the reasons I got along well with Ken Beres is that he was also "different".  He was not exactly like me, but he was definitely not your typical Congregational minister just as I've been definitely not your typical Assemblies of God minister!  Now, I'm an introvert, but at the prayer retreats, Ken was very much an extrovert!  He was not shy about sharing his opinions and saying what was on his mind.  It was obvious he was not worried about what others thought of him; and I had to admire that.

Ken had moxie!

Well, he had moxie in more ways than one!  He had moxie and he had Moxie!  The dictionary defines "moxie" as "Force of character, determination or nerve".  I learned today that the word comes from the Yiddish originally.  A big piece of the camaraderie at the prayer retreats in New Hampshire was the unusual carbonated drink known as Moxie!  An older pastor from Maine (his initials are W.C.) used to bring a whole cooler full of cans of Moxie to each retreat.  If you've never had Moxie, I'm not sure I can adequately describe it, but I'll try.  If you would take an eight ounce glass and fill it about halfway with Dr. Pepper, then fill the other half with root beer, and finally take a tablespoon of any really bitter-tasting liquid and pour that in and stir it all up, then drink it - well, that's about what Moxie tastes like!   It does leave quite a bitter after taste.  W.C. looked for brave souls who'd like to join him in drinking Moxie.  There were probably about eight or nine of us who regularly did, and his biggest supporter was Ken Beres.  In fact, it's been a number of years now, but as I recall, at the last prayer retreat or two that I attended, Ken also brought a supply of Moxie to share with others.  This may sound very unspiritual, but we'd sit there during the worship and prayer times, worshiping, praying, and drinking our Moxie!  As I've been thinking about Ken, that's what I've thought about.  In fact, I'm seriously thinking of picking up some Moxie to drink this week just as a fitting way to remember him!

What does this have to do with anything?  Well, you see, Ken demonstrated to me that it was O.K. to be the person God had made him to be and to be the pastor God had made him to be, regardless of whether that fit into other people's ideas of what a minister should or shouldn't be.  So, I shouldn't feel embarrassed that I've written on-line about my favorite secular songs or about my favorite secular situation comedy on network television, or that I've sung a couple of silly and comical songs on youtube pieces I've posted; just as I shouldn't feel embarrassed about writing on-line that I'm a highly committed Pentecostal Christian, that I'm a social conservative, and that honoring God and His Word is the most important part of my life, and that I don't happen to believe that everybody's going to the same place when they die.

I only visited Ken at his home one time.  It was right about this time of year in 2010.  Vision New England had put out a letter saying they'd decided to discontinue holding the annual prayer retreats in West Swanzey, New Hampshire.  Ken contacted Vision New England, then he contacted a few other pastors including me asking if we'd be willing to help facilitate bringing back the annual Fall prayer retreats, or help facilitate putting together some sort of alternative annual prayer retreats.  My friend Pastor Ed D. from Cape Cod and I met at Ken's home in New Bedford one weekday morning to try to hash that all out.  I remembered that Ken lived in a very beautiful and very well-kept old house.  I'm not sure if it was church-owned or if he owned it.  We had a great time getting together, but right after that, the decision was made to close the church I was pastoring in Framingham.  That whole event took so much of my time and energy that I had to forget about helping Ken regarding the prayer retreats.

The last time I remember having on-line contact with Ken Beres was just a few weeks ago.  He'd posted a memory on Facebook of his involvement as a young man in Civil Air Patrol.  I posted a comment that my late father was a Major in the Civil Air Patrol!

Yes, each time a friend is taken from this life to Heaven, it stirs up a lot of thoughts and emotions.  I hope you've been able to follow what I've written here and that somehow it honors Ken's memory.

My deepest condolences to Ken's widow and daughter, to all his family and friends, and to the church people at First Congregational Church at Lund's Corner.