Mother's Day/Father's Day - IS THERE A BETTER WAY?

"Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee." (Exodus 20:12)

I posted a piece very similar to this on my Facebook Timeline a few days ago. It received some positive comments. I decided I'd write a similar piece to post here on my blog. I hope this isn't "Shameless Self Promotion", but I hope a lot of people read it. I think it's something pastors and church leaders should think about. And, I hope that "thinking" could lead to some changes being made...if not this year, then in the future.

In the Protestant church world, Mother's Day and Father's Day (especially Mother's Day) can be very rough and traumatic for some people. The pastor is expected to celebrate these Special days and in most cases to celebrate and affirm the mothers in May and to celebrate and affirm the fathers in June. Is that a nice and appropriate thing to do? Sure it is. Often those with the most children and the most grandchildren are recognized. Cards and gifts are often distributed. What could go wrong??

Well, there's another side to Mother's Day (and to Father's Day). This past Sunday morning at the church I attend, the female guest speaker told of running out of a church building in tears one Mother's Day. You see, she's unable to biologically have children. A couple of days ago, I read an online post from a young woman who wrote about - you guessed it - running out of a church building in tears one Mother's Day. My sister who never had kids has often told me of the heartache Mother's Day has been for her. One year all of the mothers at the church service were recognized and given gifts. She said, "There were three adult women still sitting in our seats and it was uncomfortable and embarrassing."

Just a thought: When I was pastoring, our church had a special gift for every adult woman on Mother's Day, and a special gift for every adult man on Father's Day. On Mother's Day I might read a semi-humorous piece entitled "The World's Meanest Mother" and on Father's Day I might read Paul Harvey's essay entitled "What Are Fathers Made Of?". But all women were honored and appreciated on Mother's Day and all men were honored and appreciated on Father's Day.

I'm unaware of anyone ever running out of any such services at the old First Assembly of God of Framingham. I admit the church was small and I admit that I may not have been much of a success as a pastor. But I think this is one matter we handled well, and I just wanted to share it as Mother's Day is on the horizon this week, so to speak.

On Facebook, my daughter Amy Baril Julian (a medical missionary to Papua New Guinea), commented that at the church she and her family attended for a number of years in Springfield, Missouri, "... all women 18+ are given a gift on Mother's Day and the same with men 18+ on Father's Day and they stress that these people are the mothers and fathers to the generation below them in the church no matter if they are biologically related or not". That church is Oak Grove Assembly of God. I'd say Lead Pastor and Mrs. Morein at Oak Grove have a great and positive philosophy about the whole Mother's Day/Father's Day thing!

I'm not trying to lay guilt trips on any pastors or church leaders. They've already got plenty of people doing that! I'm just trying to point something out that I think needs to be pointed out!

Happy Mother's Day, May 14, 2023!

Happy Father's Day, June 18, 2023!