CHURCH PROTOCOL

“Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath:” (James 1:19)

In the Autumn of 2007, I posted a piece on the blog entitled “Protocol.” In that piece I wrote of what “protocol” is, why it’s something that’s very important to me, and what I think should be “protocol” (rules for living) in church (that is, in the evangelical Christian community) and in society in general. I had no idea that piece would spark SO much anger. It has to have been one of the 5 most controversial and anger producing pieces I’ve ever posted on the blog!

Over and over and over again, that matter of “protocol” has kept coming to my mind this week. I just can’t shake it. Yesterday, I dug through the blog archives and found the piece. I carefully and thoroughly read it over. It was evident that 99% of the anger and objections did NOT come from what I wrote about “church protocol” but rather from the latter part of the piece which stated what I believed should be “protocol in society”. So, I’ve decided to post a “kinder, gentler” piece about PROTOCOL. I’ve COMPLETELY ELIMINATED the part about protocol in SOCIETY (again the part that was objectionable for most people), and I’ve tried to rewrite and improve the part about protocol in the Christian community.

Yeah, I know, after all the past anger and controversy I suppose I’m taking quite a risk in doing this, but Pastor Mark Batterson in his book “Wild Goose Chase” says a real man or woman of God has GOT to take risks if he or she really believes God is directing them to do something! Some may doubt this, but I have such a solemn conviction God wants me to post this today, I honestly feel I’d have to repent to Him if I do not post it!

Protocol IS really important to me. Before anyone flies off the handle in anger about this piece, PLEASE carefully think about it and PRAY about it. I think there are practical tips here that could truly help you! Now, here is the “kinder and gentler” version of “Protocol”:

One Sunday in late 2007 as I was preaching from Daniel chapter 6, I spent at least five minutes on a diversion speaking about PROTOCOL. I realized during that service that protocol is SUCH an important matter to me that l almost should give a whole topical sermon on the subject, and I don’t usually give topical sermons! I am surprised and disappointed that most Christians and church members have NO IDEA how protocol is supposed to “work” in a church. I’m also perplexed that most people in general have NO IDEA how protocol is supposed to work in life, itself. I feel so strongly about this that I’m almost inclined to write a book about “Protocol” and its importance. The problem is, it’s (sadly) unlikely anybody would publish it!

I looked up “protocol” in the dictionary. It is best defined as “rules of
etiquette and diplomacy”. The word “protocol” comes from the French word “prorocole” which is from the Latin “protocollum” which literally means, “the first leaf”.

I, Bob Baril, would best define “protocol” as “the right way to do things;
the classy way to do things; the way a classy, gracious, and mature person conducts himself or herself in life’s situations”.

Here are a few examples of protocol that should be practiced in “Bible-Believing Churches” (such as an Assemblies of God churches or other evangelical congregations):

1. When people want others to “lay hands” on them and pray for them, men should pray with men and women with women. This just plain prevents a lot of inappropriate emotional contacts and situations. When a woman rushes over to lay hands on a man and pray or vice-versa, well, that’s generally a “red flag” to me. Yes, there COULD rarely be exceptions to this, but in general, it’s always best for men to pray with men and women with women.

2. There are no “assigned seats” in a church. A whole episode of the
animated sit-com “King of the Hill” made that point a few years ago. Please don’t insist on sitting in “your seat”. Please don’t be angry or annoyed if someone else happens to sit in what you perceive to be “your seat”. Sometimes sitting in a different seat helps give you a fresh perspective!

3. If you have an issue with someone in the church, please don’t say something in public to that person, such as, “You SINNED AGAINST me, but I FORGIVE YOU!” Make sure you keep conversations like that private. Keeping matters such as that private helps prevent a lot of embarrassment and confusion for everyone!

4. If you have “issues” with the church or the pastor, then make an
appointment to come in and speak to the pastor or to the Board - in person - in a calm and civil manner. Please don’t leave an unexpected and obviously angry “hit and run” letter on the pastor’s desk. Even worse, please don’t send the pastor an unexpected and obviously angry “hit and run” e-mail, and please don’t leave such a “hit and run” message on the pastor’s voice mail! Leaving such “hit and run” messages quite frankly seems to me to be very unfair, and unreasonable. In the business world, actions such as this are not respected, and are considered inappropriate and unacceptable. Why then should we practice or tolerate such actions in the church? (You can probably tell, YES, all of that stuff has been done to me over the years! I have a lot of pastor friends, and it’s done to them, too. Trust me, my pastor friends don’t like it any more than I do.)

5. Please don’t allow yourself to hold grudges. Be quick to forgive. God was quick to forgive YOU! If you’re struggling with anger and unforgiveness, take this to the Lord in prayer. I can testify, He will help you to forgive and to let go of the bitterness that can destroy you and can confuse and harm innocent people. (See Hebrews 12:15).

There are also a number of other matters of church protocol I could discuss, but I think the above five items are some of the most important. I guess it’s really all summed up in what Jesus said about loving God and loving your neighbor (see Mark 12:30-33). Sometimes we’ve all “blown it”. Listen, many times, I’ve certainly “blown it”, and I’m ashamed of that. Yes, on those many occasions, I’ve had to ask the Lord to forgive me, and I’ve had to ask my brothers and sisters in Christ to forgive me. I don’t want to sound like a fanatical prophecy preacher, but the fact is we’re living in perilous times. Our real enemy is NOT our brothers and sisters in Christ...it’s the forces of darkness (see Ephesians chapter 6). There were times in church history where (maybe) people could get away with being sloppy about “loving their neighbor” and sloppy about what I call “church protocol”. The early 21st Century is absolutely NOT one of those times!

I believe if all born-again Christians would follow the heartfelt suggestions I’ve made in this piece, our churches would be HEALTHIER; our relationship with God and with others would be healthier; things would be better off for everybody, and we’d be in “one accord” as in the Book of Acts. Most of all, I believe the Lord would be honored and pleased! We’d probably experience the revival so many of us have been praying for!

Now, in the words of my old boss, Dave Milley, “If you still love me, say AMEN!”