LETTER ON SUPER BOWL SUNDAY

“A man hath joy by the answer of his mouth: and a word spoken in due season, how good is it!” (Proverbs 15:23)

People who know me well know I’m famous for saying, “I don’t like surprises.” And I don’t. At least, I USUALLY don’t. Yesterday, I received a surprise that blessed me. After the service, I walked into my office and on my desk was a medium-sized white envelope with my name on it. I was a little puzzled as I opened it, wondering what it might be. Inside was a $20. check from a person in our church who was wishing me a “Happy Pastors’ Appreciation Day”. (At least ten years ago, Dr. James Dobson of “Focus on the Family” designated the 2nd Sunday of October as “Minister [or Pastor] Appreciation Day”.) The greeting card companies have embraced it and the rest is history. I was particularly blessed because the person who wrote me the $20. check is NOT a person of means. In fact. $20. from that person would be like $200. from most people. In a way, I’ll almost feel a little guilty when I cash it, but that person’s kindness deeply touched me.

I was a little apprehensive when I saw the envelope, because my experience has been that usually an envelope on my desk with my name on it (unless it looks like an obvious birthday card or something) is NOT a good sign. About twelve years ago, I received such a letter from a couple stating they were leaving the church. It came as a complete surprise, and to say the least, it was not pleasant. I contacted that couple and insisted they meet with a Board member and me at a neutral location before leaving. They did that, but boy, I wish people would learn that the “hit and run” letter approach can be very destructive.

The classic was the Letter on Super Bowl Sunday. It was Super Bowl Sunday 1997. If you recall, that was the year the Patriots went to the Super Bowl against the Green Bay Packers. That had been quite an intense weekend for me. My sister’s short marriage was on its last legs. She had what turned out to be a final meeting with her husband and a professional counselor. I was asked to be in that meeting, sort of as “moral support” for her. It was the Saturday of that weekend and it was tough. After a grueling “session” her husband enthusiastically asked me about whether I thought the Patriots could beat Green Bay. Well, I guess he’d given up on the marriage, but figured there was still hope for the Patriots.

Many of the guys of our church were getting together at a Board Member's house for a Super Bowl party. I stopped by my office around 3 that Sunday, shortly before heading over to Dave’s house. On my desk was an unexpected envelope with my name on it. I opened it. In small type was a two page computer written letter from a prominent man in our church. The letter was highly critical of me. The man is no longer at our church, but I won’t use his real name. I’ll call him “Nick”. When you read this, you may think I hate Nick. I really don’t. Nick and I exchange e-mails from time to time and occasionally we get together socially. Nick has never flat out apologized for the letter. but it WAS over eleven years ago, and from his body language and demeanor, I think he NOW regrets having sent it.

I’ve been in full-time ministry for over twenty-seven years. In that amount of time, I still think this is the worst letter anyone ever sent me. The letter started out insisting I could tell no one about the letter. (That’s very unfair. If you want to level charges at someone you should be willing to have those charges objectively examined by others!) The letter accused me of “not sacrificing” and essentially accused my immediate family and I of being extremely greedy because we insisted on receiving all of our benefits (in my contract) and that I had asked the church to reimburse me $24. for a professional journal I’d subscribed to.

It was tough to read that just a couple of hours or so before the game. It was really tough to get through the Super Bowl with that on my mind, but I went to Dave’s house that night and enjoyed pizza with the guys. In the second half, the Pats went down to defeat, but we had a “fun evening” anyway. On Monday morning, I wrote Nick one of the greatest letters of my letter-writing career. I cited some Scripture from the Apostle Paul, but I also pointed out that in the previous few months, the church had received several unexpected large checks from my mother, from my brother-in-law, and from a wealthy businessman who was a friend of mine. I pointed out that they did not give these checks to “First Assembly of God of Framingham” for the fun of it, nor did they give them coincidentally or accidentally. They gave them because of a personal connection to ME. If I “blew” a few hundred dollars of that money on myself and my benefits, did I feel guilty about it? No, I certainly did not.

Maybe part of why I’m thinking about that is that on Saturday I listened to an outstanding C.D. by a minister friend of mine from rural Kentucky. In his sermon, he told the story that he purchased a guitar and an amplifier and had been going with several others on a regular basis to minister at a nursing home. My friend told two pathetic stories on that C.D. about people who had felt sorry for themselves and whined and complained about various facets of that nursing home ministry...never thinking about the sacrifice HE had made, and of course, missing the big picture of the sacrifice our Lord Jesus Christ has made! As a pastor, I could absolutely relate.

Yes, I’ve had my “Letter on Super Bowl Sunday”!

But, thank God, I now have had a NEW Letter on Super Bowl Sunday. Nope, this weekend was NOT the Super Bowl, and in fact the Patriots lost to San Deigo...but that simple $20. check and act of kindness made Columbus Day weekend a kind of a “Super Bowl Weekend” for me!