“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. “ (Genesis 2:24)
A woman I’ve been acquainted with for a number of years called me this week and asked me a question I have never been asked before. She and her husband have several grown kids ... some are biological children and some are legally adopted children. One of their biological sons and one of their adopted daughters have fallen in love and are getting married in a few weeks. She and her husband are agonizing about it but will most likely NOT attend. the wedding. I was surprised that such a wedding is legal, because I thought once there was a LEGAL adoption, this would legally be considered incest (even though there is no biological relationship). I said I thought such a marriage was wrong and that if it were me, I don’t think I would attend.
I then "ran this by" someone close to me who strongly disagreed with me saying the parents SHOULD attend and that the marriage does not matter because there is no biological relationship.
I later e-mailed a few mature Christian friends (many of whom are pastors) and asked for their thoughts. To my surprise, only one (a Baptist pastor from Cape Cod) took a hard line on it, saying it was legally incest and would not be a proper marriage. Most who responded felt there was no problem with this marriage taking place, and felt the parents should attend the ceremony. A couple of folks were neutral and really had no opinion either way.
They certainly didn’t teach about encountering this sort of thing at Central Bible College!
I’m actually glad it’s not a situation where I’ve been asked to perform the ceremony or even where I’m invited to the wedding. But it’s probably the most difficult moral and ethical question I’ve been asked in a long time.
What do you think? Incidentally, this is a TRUE story. Obviously, I don’t want to reveal the identity of the family or the community or state in which they reside.
But I’m genuinely trying to sort this question out, and I’m interested in Biblical and legal input anyone may have about it.
EMMYS 1970: My World...and Welcome To It
1 year ago
1 comment:
I'm not sure there's any biblical precedent. There's stuff about stepsiblings I think, but nothing about adopted siblings.
There's no biological consequence, and one can understand why they would be drawn to each other having spent so much time together.
It's kind of the old "What if Greg Brady fell for Marcia Brady" argument. I'm inclined to think it's not quite on the level of incest, but might lead to some awkward family pictures...
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