"ZIP IT !"

“...be ye therefore wise as serpents, and harmless as doves.” (from Matthew 10:16)

Do you remember the old “Morton Downey, Jr.” television talk show from the late 1980s?  Downey pioneered RUDE talk.  (I could be wrong but I think he was doing that sort of talk BEFORE Jerry Springer.)  Initially his show was seen on New York City’s channel 9.  I first watched it on cable.  Then it became nationally syndicated and Boston’s channel 38 picked it up.  As I recall it was on several nights a week around 8 p.m.

Sadly Morton Downey, Jr. is dead.  He was a chain smoker.  I believe he died of lung cancer.  He was very obnoxious and one thing he constantly yelled at his guests and his studio audience was the line, “Zip it, ZIP IT!!”  Well, that’s the inspiration for my title.

I’m worn out.  It’s maybe not “clergy correct” or “church correct” to write what I’m about to write, but twice recently I’ve gotten myself into horrific situations because of e-mails.  I recently wrote about responding in immediate anger and zeal to a confrontational e-mail, and that I painfully was reminded that’s NOT the way to do it, AND that I’m going to start waiting 24 hours before responding to controversial e-mails.  I’m also (until further notice) going to start waiting 24 hrs. before responding to ALL e-mails!  That will not be a permanent policy, but it IS in effect through at least next Sunday.

About a week ago, I responded to an e-mail which was sort of a CONTROVERSIAL e-mail but not really a CONFRONTATIONAL e-mail.  That e-mail somehow accidentally got FORWARDED to a person I wrote some negative things about.  I was confronted by that person at a restaurant meeting over the weekend.  As a teenager, I used to dread disciplinary confrontations with my father.  Boy, yesterday, a disciplinary confrontation with my father would have looked REAL GOOD!  Well, in comparison to sitting at a restaurant table and explaining why you wrote negative things about someone in an e-mail...explaining it to the person you wrote it about TO THEIR FACE; yes, facing an angry Eugene A. Baril with a list of punishment details would have been a pleasure.  I hope you never have that lovely experience I had yesterday afternoon.  I am not blaming the angry person I wrote about.   I am also not blaming the person who wrote me the letter that I then responded to.  I am saying that HAD I WAITED 24 HRS.  to respond, it is very possible I just would NOT have written most or all of the nasty stuff I wrote about that person I was later confronted by.

This is a very “dicey” job...being a pastor.  I know, “it’s not a job, it’s a ministry.”  Well, it’s actually both.  And it involves all sorts of interpersonal struggles, foibles and situations.  To survive as a pastor you have to be as prayerful as a pious saint, as good a preacher as Billy Graham, almost as good a businessman as Lee Iacocca,  AND you have to have the interpersonal street smarts of Lt. Columbo who LOOKS stupid but doesn’t miss a trick.  I actually USUALLY do O.K. with the Lt. Columbo thing, but let me tell you, if you “let your guard down” on that one, it can come back to bite you; listen it can come back to cripple you and worse.  

Yes, I did it.  I cannot pass the buck.  I DID IT.

But this is the second time I’ve been “had” by responding to e-mails in as many weeks. So until at least next Sunday, I’m not responding to ANY e-mail for at least 24 hours and if and when I do respond, my responses will be brief and cautious.

In the words of “Serge” from the film, “Beverly Hills Cop”, “DON’T   be  STUPID!”
Yes, don’t be stupid.  Be careful with e-mail.  I’m living proof you gotta be careful and I’m serious about the 24 hr. thing.  And as far as “instant messaging me”, don’t even THINK of it!